In my career as a dating & love coach, I’ve worked with many single men and women who have great stories — but here is the story of a woman who embraced the process with such vigor that she got embraced right back. My client (call her J) met, courted, got engaged, pregnant and married at warp speed — a mere 14 months! She did everything prescribed to fulfill her quest to find a husband, and her story should serve as an inspiration to anyone who wants to start the New Year with a new love.
She was unusually positive, open, and enthusiastic from day one. She was committed to finding a husband, come h_ll or high water and didn’t let minor setbacks or disappointments discourage her.
She went through our “Marriage Map” process, where she defined the list of traits which were important to her in her future husband…(High GHQ traits) – and started dating with intention – accepting the right guys, and throwing the wrong ones back to the pond….
She developed a 3 pronged dating plan: a) Embrace online dating and open herself to new great guys she couldn’t have met otherwise, b) meet new people in everyday life, and c) Leverage great setups by being open with friends and family to letting them help her. She followed her plan flawlessly and relentlessly
She put together a great online profile; her description and photos were cute, feminine and showed off her fun personality. She got on to JDate in a very memorable way. She used her photos and a fun online essay (mentioning singing the theme song to Three’s Company as her favorite childhood memory) to leverage herself into dozens of dates. She had nothing less than an avalanche of inbound emails and winks within 48 hours.
She raised her sense of style to a new level. She trusted our style guidance (and bought a blue wrap dress for her photo shoot and had the most stunning headshot ever!) She’s now a devotee to the right colors/types of dresses for her!
She made a point every day to be open to meeting new people in her everyday life–at Starbucks, the subway, anywhere
She leveraged her networks to meet single people, and was awash in setups- she asked everyone around her to keep her in mind for “someone wonderful.”
Now, for the coup de gras. Knowing that meeting men through friends is a GREAT way (over 1/3 of all married people were set up by friends/family), she and her friend Jen threw a singles event in Manhattan in November 2010. They each invited a group of single friends, and told them to invite their single friends….and at that fateful event, J met D (a friend of Jen’s), a fun, flirty guy – and when he contacted her – she was smitten from the get go. By date one, they already seemed like a great match. D asked her out for date two very shortly thereafter….She knew that she wanted to get married and have kids – and he did too. He told her that they needed to date for 6 months before anything “permanent” could happen (the big M)…As she rode the roller coaster of the relationship, D promised J that her life would change by her landmark birthday in July. As I was getting ready for bed – I got a text from J at 11pm on a Saturday night in July…with a ring on her finger. Magical. And, J wanted to have a baby, and wanted to get a jump on this – and amazingly became pregnant with a little boy shortly after the engagement!! (Why on earth wait when you know what you want, and you’ve got the right man?)
So, wherever you are, and whatever you’re drinking, please raise a toast to J, D and baby boy C – an amazing couple (and now family!) with an inspiring, true story. We lift our glasses to J, her plan, to D the high GHQ man, to never giving up, and to a lifetime of happiness
Posted on Fri, January 6, 2012
by Bela Gandhi